True Self

“So often I ask myself how I have changed, and how the things around me have changed, but maybe this isn’t the right question to ask. Maybe the right question to ask is: What has not changed? What has stayed the same?”

In a conversation with my girlfriend last night this idea presented itself, and I can’t get her words out of my head. I’ve spent some much time and energy trying to ‘learn who I am’ and I felt pretty confident that I had it all down pact. After letting these thoughts sit for a while, however, I’m not sure if that is the case anymore.

I would say that I know myself quite well, but yet at the same time there are so many questions left unanswered about myself. The problem is that I forget that the soul is seemingly infinite, and that to probe its depths would take more than a hundred life times. The individual shifts and changes with time; they move and expand with life. With each breathe the scope of the individual grows in depth.

If this is true, then how does one begin to probe such a depth? How does one view such a great unknown reality?

Often times, I believe we view life as being built, layer upon layer and facet upon facet, like a landscape a thousand years before an archeological dig. At one moment certain truths stand firm and then are burned to the ground. On top of them new realities are build, until they, like the realities before them, are conquered. So, a thousand years later, when the dig begins, each section found is strikingly different, and each artifact discovered is quite appropriate for the time in which it was crafted.

I wonder, however, if maybe life is not like an archeological digging site. Maybe life is more like a painting, a poem, or a story. Maybe life is not about how the sections are different as time moves on, but is, rather, about the over arching meaning of it all. Maybe life is more about the concept, or the idea, that will never be compromised not matter how many revisions are made. Maybe life is about what has been there all along, and about what will always continue to be there. Maybe life isn’t about what is unearthed, but rather, about what has always been at the surface.

The true self is not weathered by time, but remains unchanged throughout the ages.


About Jeremiah Dowling

I write poetry and take crazy pictures in an Orange Chair all over the United States while reading amazing books.

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